You, Me And The In Between
Aside from the beginning stages of dating, you know what else really grinds my gears? That in between phase that exists where your not quite exclusive but your not quite nonexclusive with someone. When your dating and you begin acting like a couple but when someone asks you who that guy or girl is you don't really know how to answer.
Whoever said dating is supposed to be an enjoyable experience clearly never experienced it. For a woman, dating can be a stressful experience, especially when we're seeing someone we really like. We just want things to go well so a relationship can be formulated. If only things were that black and white. I think the biggest thing I wonder while attending this circus called "My So-Called Dating Life" is, what is the tipping point that takes you from potential couple to exclusive duo?
Dozens of relationship articles have been written about it. But what is the defining factor that ultimately defines the relationship? It's my opinion that in the majority of potential relationships out there, one person has what you might call "the upper-hand." Now "the upper-hand" is often in the form of baggage that has to be worked around in order to maintain the relationship (whether it's a previous bad relationship, baby mommas drama or that long criminal wrap sheet, just to throw a few out there.) So the equation is simple-the person with the most baggage dictates the course of the relationship-the other person has to work around and accept that baggage, or walk away.
This is an incredibly frustrating rule, one that ultimately makes or breaks relationships. But does that mean the tipping point is when the person with the most baggage decides the person they're dating can handle their baggage?
This is what I think about a lot of times...the anatomy of a relationship, how it begins, what happens throughout the duration and how it ends. Though many of these situations are related to my own personal dating life, I still think about these things when it's not. This is one mystery I have yet to solve.
Of course every situation is going to be different, so every potential couple arrangement probably has different tipping points. I think the biggest tipping point where I decide if someone is relationship material is when I face a trial or tribulation with someone and make it through; whether it's your first big disagreement, or dealing with family situations or even distance. I think once you get over that first big hump, whatever it is, you might be able to make it through many more together. That's what gets me because one of the biggest benefits of a relationship is having someone support you and have your back.
For anyone out there in an "in between" situation, I advise you to hang in there because I know I am. The fact is, only time will tell if a relationship will grow from your current set up. The good thing is, if your using your head and if the person your dating is ultimately a negative presence in your life, it shouldn't take too long to figure that out. Happy dating all!
Whoever said dating is supposed to be an enjoyable experience clearly never experienced it. For a woman, dating can be a stressful experience, especially when we're seeing someone we really like. We just want things to go well so a relationship can be formulated. If only things were that black and white. I think the biggest thing I wonder while attending this circus called "My So-Called Dating Life" is, what is the tipping point that takes you from potential couple to exclusive duo?
Dozens of relationship articles have been written about it. But what is the defining factor that ultimately defines the relationship? It's my opinion that in the majority of potential relationships out there, one person has what you might call "the upper-hand." Now "the upper-hand" is often in the form of baggage that has to be worked around in order to maintain the relationship (whether it's a previous bad relationship, baby mommas drama or that long criminal wrap sheet, just to throw a few out there.) So the equation is simple-the person with the most baggage dictates the course of the relationship-the other person has to work around and accept that baggage, or walk away.
This is an incredibly frustrating rule, one that ultimately makes or breaks relationships. But does that mean the tipping point is when the person with the most baggage decides the person they're dating can handle their baggage?
This is what I think about a lot of times...the anatomy of a relationship, how it begins, what happens throughout the duration and how it ends. Though many of these situations are related to my own personal dating life, I still think about these things when it's not. This is one mystery I have yet to solve.
Of course every situation is going to be different, so every potential couple arrangement probably has different tipping points. I think the biggest tipping point where I decide if someone is relationship material is when I face a trial or tribulation with someone and make it through; whether it's your first big disagreement, or dealing with family situations or even distance. I think once you get over that first big hump, whatever it is, you might be able to make it through many more together. That's what gets me because one of the biggest benefits of a relationship is having someone support you and have your back.
For anyone out there in an "in between" situation, I advise you to hang in there because I know I am. The fact is, only time will tell if a relationship will grow from your current set up. The good thing is, if your using your head and if the person your dating is ultimately a negative presence in your life, it shouldn't take too long to figure that out. Happy dating all!
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